Replied, "No, I'm using distilled water." Her, "I hope you are not washing those plates under the tap!" She I was helping out in a first year undergraduate practical class when I cameĪcross a girl who was washing Potassium Bromide plates under the tap. How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker? None. How many physical chemists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he'll change it three times, plot a straight line through the data, and then extrapolate to zero concentration. How many atoms in a guacamole? Avocado's number. How do you make a 24-molar solution? Put you artificial teeth in water. How about the chemical workers - are they unionized? ![]() Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium H 2O is water and H 2O 2 is hydrogen peroxide. Got mole problems? Call Avogadro at 602-1023. "unionized" a synonym for neutral? (No, it means they will stopĬarrying a charge until they get more money.)Ĭhemistry is really funny there are even people who laugh at nitrogen(I)ĭid you hear about the industrialist who had a huge chloroform spill at hisįree radicals have revolutionized chemistry. We can't serve aĪnother example is the name for a molecule that is not ionized. "Sorry, our maximum occupancy is only 6.00 x 10 23. Other, 'Non-polar.') Man: Sorry, I just don't think the chemistry is right.Ī mole of moles would collapse under its own weight and become a black mole.Ī mordant thought: Old color chemists never dye, they just fade awayĪ small furry mammal walks into a bar and orders a drink. Names and weights." One kid popped up, "Yeah, but teach, there were so She said "Why when I was your age I knew both their I was reading a book on helium and I just couldn’t put it down.A chemistry teacher was berating the students for not learning the Periodic I have many chemistry jokes but I’m afraid they won’t get a good reaction What happens when Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up? People who study it have alkynes of trouble. When God created the earth, what mattered to him most? What do solids, liquids and gases have in common? What does a photon say when the bellboy asks if he needs any help with his luggage?ĭid you hear oxygen and magnesium got together? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium. What do you call an acid with an attitude? What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him? What is a chemist’s favorite holiday song?Ī neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much a drink costs.ĭid you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? I like to hear chemistry puns, periodically The proton is not speaking to the other proton, he’s mad atom.Ĭhemists are so happy in the lab because they’re in their element. ![]() I can’t remember that element, but it’s on the tip of my tungsten. You’re too angry, you need to molecule off. If you’re not problem of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate. I think that angry flask completely overreacted. Salt made a pun joke and it was Sodium funny Gold is the best element because it’s AU-some Here are 45 Chemistry Puns And Jokes Any Science Nerd Will Love Whether you’re a chemist or just try to remember your favorite (or not-so-favorite) subject in school, there should to be a funny Chemistry pun for you to enjoy. Scientists, teachers, and anyone with science humor will giggle at a good play on words about Chemistry. Enjoy some funny chemistry jokes, puns, and one-liners. Up and atom! The elements of a good Chemistry pun are nerdy wordplay and periodic table humor.
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